Dealing, Healing and Grief

A very good friend of mine has been having a difficult time lately. There have been problems in his life where the love of his life was removed from his home. And the reason for this was because he loved her and wanted to care for her. But in the midst of that family decided it was best they not be together. I hope this helps my friend.

Sometimes we associate grief with the death of a loved one, pet etc... But that isn't always true. We can grieve over loss of independence, that one gets me. And then we grieve over loss of loved ones due to divorce or seperation. There are many things we grieve over and that is perfectly normal. The steps to grief are as follows;

When a person experiences the loss of someone they love, either through divorce or death, they are forced to deal with grief. When a loss occurs, most of us are unprepared for how to handle it, especially if we have never had to deal with it before. Even if we have, it is still traumatic each time.

DENIAL-You tell yourself that it isn't happening. You tell yourself that your spouse or loved one will come back to you.

ANGER -You become angry at the way you were treated. Expressing anger is a sign that you are beginning to deal with your loss. If anger isn't expressed, it will make you bitter and hamper your recovery. It is important not to bury your anger, and it is important to express all of your anger before you try to forgive that person.

BARGAINING -Reaching the bargaining stage shows that you have begun to face the fact that the relationship is ending. You are past the denial stage. This is a necessary stage, and it helps you to look at what caused the problems in the first place.

DEPRESSION -It comes during the anger stage, and the bargaining stage, and in the letting go stage. It is characterized by many of the symptoms listed in the Symptoms of Grief. Depression is normal.

ACCEPTANCE -When you have worked through all of the other stages, you will come to acceptance. You will realize that it is final, and you are ready to get on with your life.You will come to realize that everything happened for the best, and that your life does have meaning. You will begin to feel free from the pain and the hurt. You will be finished with your grieving. You are ready to move on to a new life and let the other life remain in the past. You will be able to remember the good as well as the bad.